(John, Me and Jason)
(John, Jason and Me)Each day since he's been gone, I've looked at his photo hanging on my wall. I've talked about him with my girls. He is alive in my heart and mind and I pray forever instilled in the hearts and minds of my children. In a way, he was my first baby. The "practice child" I nurtured when I was just a child myself. I used to resent that...having that responsibility so young. Now? Now I'm grateful that my mother could trust me so much with him. I'm grateful for those little moments I wouldn't have had otherwise and the bond it created between us.
That bond may be broken in this imperfect life, but it is still alive in my heart. I will carry it on with me until I can see him again in Paradise. Then, then we can laugh and smile again. We can embrace one another with an unknown joy. He can laugh at me for having to grow so old in this system. And I can laugh at him because he'll finally understand the promises of Jehovah God (Psalm 83:18; Exodus 6:3) are real. Silly boy...ye of little faith...I hate that it will take something so drastic to make a point with you. I'm thrilled to know you will have another chance to learn to let God in your heart and life. I'm thrilled that you can be reunited with those you've lost, your father, your grand-parents. People who meant so much to you. Your hurt will be gone forever and you my very special, very loved brother...you will have an opportunity for the greatest life possible. A life lived in Truth, Knowledge and Perfection. A life governed by our Creator and Mentor; Jehovah and his son Christ Jesus.
(One of Jason's practical jokes on my birthday)As I sit here in my imperfect world, aching desperately in my heart to hear your voice again, I am reminded that I have so much HOPE. The Hope of living in a world where "death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore." (Rev 21:4) Jason, I know that you, even though taken in death...you have that Hope too. (Acts 24:15) For that reason alone, I am eternally indebted to the mercies of Jehovah.
(I miss your humor)Until we meet again...